Thursday, October 14, 2010

5 of the Worst Horror Movies I've Ever Seen

There are certain horror movies that jut fall short on so many different things it's hard to take them seriously, and then there are the movies that are so much worse than that there are no words that can describe how utterly lacking they really are. I have searched through my movie collection and picked out five of the worst movies I could find, be warned, if you go into to watching these movies expecting a serious horror film you will be so severely disappointed your entire body may implode, I can not guarantee your safety. If, however, you are looking for a good laugh at some absolutely absurd scenes from horror movies past, enjoy!


5. Killer Klowns from Outer Space




A troop of homicidal, alien clowns land their circus tent spaceship in a small town and terrorize its residents. Do I need to say more? Well I'm going to, while that one sentence may be enough to convince you this movie is probably not going to wow you, it gets worse. It is revealed that the "Klowns" are kidnapping towns people and wrapping them in a cotton candy cocoon that dissolves them into a liquid...which the "Klowns" then drink..through crazy straws. I think you can pretty much gather what the rest of the film is like from there, if you don't ever see this film you're not missing much, but its a good movie to watch if you're in need of a laugh.
No seriously, alien clowns with creme pies.


4. Gingerdead Man


The movie opens with serial killer Millard Findlemeyer, played by Gary Busey, shooting up a diner and killing half of the family that owns it, we're off to an okay start. Findlemeyer is aprehended and sentenced to death, he is then cremated and sent to his mother, who is a witch...bear with me. She mixes his ashes into a ginger bread cookie mix and sends it to the bakery the remaining family members her son hadn't murdered. After deciding to bake the mixture into a large gingerbread man, and accidentally electrocuting it somehow, the giant cookie springs to life and begins murdering people. Give yourself a moment and take all of that in, I'll wait...ready to continue? As in most monster movies, the creature appears dead at the end but isn't and sets up a sequel, in this case named "Gingerdead Man 2: Passion of the Crust". The only redeeming thing about this  movie is Gary Busey voicing the Gingerdead Man, other than that this movie should be avoided.
No, I wasn't making it up, its really about a homicidal cookie.


3. Leprechaun: Back 2 tha Hood


Just read the title, isn't that enough to convince you this is  a terrible movie? Like all the other Leprechaun movies, this one centers around the Leprechaun character killing people and reclaiming the gold they took from him, only it's in the ghetto, and this is the second movie in the series to have happened in the ghetto, hence the "2" in the title. There honestly isn't much more to it than that, terrible one liners, awful effects, and horrible acting. There is just so much of those three things it is almost unfathomable, not to mention at the point this movie was made the series had been beaten to death with terrible sequels ( this is the sixth Leprechaun movie) such as "Leprechaun 4: In Space". Do yourself a favor, don't see this movie.
 Wait...what?


2. C.H.U.D. II: Bud the C.H.U.D.


If you haven't seen the original C.H.U.D. go see it now! It is one of my favorite movies and a real classic, which is probably why I hate this movie so much. The movie follows three teenage boys who break into a Center for Disease Control and steal a body for a prank. Unfortunately it's a C.H.U.D. and it wakes up and goes on a killing spree, turning countless people into C.H.U.D.s as well. This movie has it all, bad acting, bad effects, bad production, bad dialogue, more or less bad everything. While I do detest this movie as a sequel to the first C.H.U.D., I have to tell you that it is pretty funny due to it's enormous follies. If you don't look to this movie to live up to the previous one, you can poke fun at how terrible it is, but only because it is just that, terrible.
Most peoples reaction while watching this movie.




1. Troll 2


A family takes a trip to the town of Nilbog (Goblin spelled backwards) and is plagued by vegetarian goblins who turn humans into plants and eat them. Seriously, that's what the movie is about, and there are no trolls in the movie. You read that correctly, zero trolls are in this movie, and it is in no way connected to the movie "Troll". Did I mention that the ghost of the families grandfather shows up through out the movie to help out? There are not enough words in the English language to explain how terrible this movie is in every aspect, so I'll just leave you with this scene...







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Hope you guys enjoyed my list, I've got my pumpkin carving post lined up and I should have it written in the next few days along with my visit to the local specialty shops around here. I'm going to put up a poll and give you guys a choice of what one of my next posts will be so be sure to vote!

17 comments:

  1. those are some terrible movies.

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  2. Lol ill make sure to skip these

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  3. now hell no cant be hateing on my movie killer clowns i love that movie.now the others hel yeah they are hunks of garbage. i have watched them all. gingerdead man is such crap its almost unbelievable it ever got made. and troll 2 is actully i think a stain on the blot of humanaity lol.

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  4. troll 2 was legendary hillarious

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  5. hahaha I really want to check these movies out now.

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  6. Had spread their cursed deed, and honourd name Following!

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  7. Graces her subjects, and her thoughts the king. Supporting!

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  8. As I am son and servant to your will. Supporting!

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  9. Agree!
    anyways, cool blog, i'll follow and support!

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  10. I don't get how you can hate "Killer Klowns from Outer Space" yet love "C.H.U.D." Klowns is awesome. I believe the same three brothers did the script, directing, and special effects. Plus they got the Dickies to do the theme song! Both, the film and the song, are classics.

    I agree with your take on "Leprechaun: Back 2 tha Hood" though, as well as "Troll 2." What a disappointment with that one.

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  11. Those leprerchaun are the bomb . dont dis them

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  12. those leperchaun movies are the bomb

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